This Game Won’t Work: 5 Classic Games That Shouldn’t Be Apps

With the new Splendor app enjoying good reviews and 7 Wonders launching an open beta, publishers are falling over themselves to convert board games into apps. But there are a few games out there that might not work so well. Here are our top 5 games that probably shouldn’t be licensed just yet:

5. Star Trek: the Next Generation Interactive VCR Game

What’s the Game?: Experience “beej” when a Klingon warrior takes control of the starship Enterprise.

Why This Game Won’t Work: Despite several creative attempts, it has been determined that VCR tapes won’t actually fit into an iPad.

What Might Make It Work: Players could join the crew of the starship Enterprise, then play the game on their PADDs the next time Klingons take over the ship.

4. Advanced Squad Leader

What’s the Game?: This classic World War II simulation has rules for every contingency, even the chances of an individual soldier starting a fire in wet weather. It’s… uh… a little complex.

Why This Game Won’t Work: Even modern computers have their limits.

What Might Make It Work: Instead of simulating World War II, try simulating players playing Advanced Squad Leader.  

3. Hungry Hungry Hippos

What’s the Game?: Marbles shoot all over the board and your hungry hippo catches and eats them.

Why It Won’t Work: The marbles kept rolling off the iPad.

What Might Make It Work: Replace the marbles with Angry Birds.

2. 52 Card Pick-up

What’s the Game: Hilarity ensues after you approach a friend with a pack of cards and ask her if she would like to play.

Why This Game Won’t Work: Scattering 52 iPads around the room proves to be expensive and hard on the iPads.

What Might Make It Work: What if the cards were scattered and you had to find them using augmented reality?

1. Trouble!

What’s The Game?: An otherwise ordinary race to the finish comes to life with a strength-building random number generator.

Why This Game Won’t Work: Early attempts to strap Bluetooth Pop-o-Matic devices onto phones have failed miserably. “It spoils the form factor,” one hipster engineer laments. “Carrying the phone and the device in my pocket makes people think I’m happy to see them.”

What Might Make It Work: Now you’re just asking for Trouble!